Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?

What's the difference between a novel and a book?

How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?

If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?

If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth?

If you have a cold hot pocket, is it just a pocket?

If humans evolved from monkey's/apes, why are they still here?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why is the show called unsolved mysteries? if they were solved they wouldn't be mysteries.

Do penguins have knees?

Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?

How come people tell you not to stand in front of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it?

Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway?

In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?

Why are both of Spongebob's parents round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?

Does a two-humped camel store more water than a one-humped camel?

If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?

Why is it that if someone yells "duck" they are helping you, but if they yell "chicken" they are insulting you?

If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?

If they have angel food cake on earth, do they have people food cake in heaven?

If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy?

Do they call a fortune teller who cant see a "blind seer"?

Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts?

Can you cry underwater?

You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?

If an African elephant comes to America, is it an African-American elephant?

Why doesn't flavored gum turn your mouth that color?

If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?

Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?

Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are?

If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in water... how did she ever bathe?

If bald people work as chefs in a restaurant,do they have to wear hairnets?

Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :'Caution: May Cause Drowsiness?

Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on?

How can Darth Vader breathe and talk at the same time?

If there's a wheelchair-bound comedian, is it still called "stand-up"?

When the French swear do they say pardon my English?

Do people who use sign language see little hands in their head when they think about what somebody said, or do they hear the words in their head?

How did Walt Disney figure out how to make people pay to stand in lines all day?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they call someone "late" if they died early?

Why are the adjectives 'fast as' and 'slow as' often used in conjunction with hell, is hell slow or fast?

If the serving size on a can of soda is one can, then why is the serving size on the little can one can, too? Wouldn't the little cans be 2 cans?

If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family?

Why are red buttons always the most important?

How is chess considered a sport?

Why is it when your sleeping it`s called drool but when your awake its called spit?

If a hermaphrodite got sent to a certain gender prison, which one would it get sent to?

If a teacher were to teach a younger grade than they were teaching before, would they be "degraded"?

If you get chemo-therapy do you lose your pubic hairs?

Would you die if you didn't pee?

Why does every Abraham Lincoln impersonator sound the same, even though there are no known audio recordings of the man?

How's come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up.

Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.

When Jewish People go to Court, they can't swear on the bible, can they?

If marbles are not made of marble, why are they called marbles?

If you dig a hole through the center of the earth, come out on the other side, and then let go, would you be falling down or floating up?

Could you be a closet claustrophobic?

Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so, how would you treat them?

If ketchup is good on french fries, how come it isn't good on mashed potatoes?

Where do all the daylight savings hours go?

Why doesn't the hair on your arms grow as fast as the hair on your head?

What happens if a black cat walks under a ladder and breaks a mirror?

Why when people ask you "what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?" no one ever replies, "A BOAT"

Why are elderly people often called "old people" but children are never called "new people"?

How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?

Why doesn't broccoli come in a can?

Can you slam a revolving door?

How young can you be, but still die of old age?

What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?

Can a cross-eyed teacher control his pupils?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?

What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?

Can you read a picture book?

Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?

Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts!

If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?

if you're on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19?

What happens if every team in the NFL goes 8-8?

What shape is the sky?

If a Jewish person goes to court and is asked to put their right hand on the Bible, do they use a Torah instead?

Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?

If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?

If you have a gun and you ask, "can I ask you a question?" and they say "fire away" should you shoot them?

What is a chickpea if it is neither a chick nor a pea?

Why is it called the People's Republic Of China when China's not a republic?

Why are dandelions considered weeds when daisies are considered flowers?

Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?

Whenever an adult is kidnapped why isn't it called adultnapped??

Why do blacklights look purple?

Did Yankee Doodle name the feather, hat, town, or his pony Macaroni?

Why is it that people duck in the rain, do they really think the rain won't hit them?

How come the Bible is the most stolen book, and one of the ten comandments is "thou shall not steal"?

Why isn't the caps lock capitalized?

If there's a hole straight through the earth, from the south pole to the north pole, and you jump through it what would happen? would you keep falling forever, or fall back down when you get to the middle, or is it physically impossible?

If someone with a nostril ring takes it out, then blows their nose, do they have to cover that hole as well as their nostril holes so that snot does'nt blow out everywere?

Isn't it weird that if you rearange the word "teacher" you get "cheater"?

How come whenever you start to sing, you automatically sing in a higher voice than you talk?

How come people say they ate the last piece of gum, when they really just chew it?

If a pope goes to the bathroom, is it considered holy crap?

You know the saying "throw ya hands in the air like ya don't care"? why bother doing that if you dont care?

Why is there no pine or apple in pineapple?

If "Fantasy Island" really granted wishes, why wasn't Tattoo 6'6" ?

Why do water bottles have a "best if used by" date?

If you called the police station to talk to an officer and he was not there, would that be considered a cop out?

Can bald people get a hair line fracture?

Why do they put holes in crackers?

How come on TV the bell always rings and then the kids go to class, but in real life you need to be in class before the bell rings?

Why can the saying "it's all downhill from here." mean both that it will be easy and that it is going to get worse?

If all of ACME's products backfire, why does Wile E. Coyote keep buying them?

Why do "cool" and "hot" mean the same thing?

If you sneeze and fart at the same time, does a vacuum form in your stomach?

Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread?

Does a baby feel the umbilical cord being cut off?

Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?

Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

If you have a pet with 2 heads do you have to name both heads?

Why can't liquor freeze?

If you dig a hole in the south pole are you digging up or down?

How come they don't add the time that we are in our mom's to our age?

Why do people squint their eyes when they can't see? Wouldn't that just make it less space to see out of?

What is a hacky, and why is it in a sack?

Who was in the kitchen with Dina?

Why do we have to pay a toll on "freeways"?

Why do they call them pepperoni if there is no pepper in it?

How old does something have to be to become an antique?

Can a school teacher give a homeless child homework?

Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?

Do babies produce more spit than adults?

How come French fries are not considered a vegetable, they are just deep fried potatoes?

Do cows have calf muscles?

Why is shampoo clear but conditioner not?

If conjoined twins participate in sports, do they count as one or two players?

If a singer sings their own song during a karaoke party, is it considered karaoke?

Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?

If you died with braces on would they take them off?

If a person suffered from amnesia and then was cured would they remember that they forgot?

Can someone have their head in the clouds and be down-to-earth at the same time?

Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?

If you were a pastor, and you were getting married, would you hire a pastor, or would you do the wedding yourself?

Is there a certain temperature at which it stops being qualified as cold? At what temperature does it qualify as hot?

Why is most lunchmeat bigger than the bread?

Why is it that whenever you sing to the radio, your voice is higher? Even when you have a low voice?

How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?

Have ex-punsters been expunged?

Have ex-mathematicians become dysfunctional?

Have ex-locomotive engineers been derailed?

Have ex-civil lawyers been distorted?

Have ex-bankers become disinterested?

Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards?

Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?

Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?

Don't you have to get up to get to the tape?

Why is the word "abbreviate" so long?

Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

Why is Mickey Mouse bigger than his dog Pluto?

Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?

Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? Why is it when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open it's not adoor?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?

Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?

Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?

Why is it called a bust, when it stops right before the part it is named after?

Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?

Why is a women's prison called a penal colony?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

Why don't you ever see baby pigeons?

Why don't you ever hear about gruntled employees?

Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?

Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?

Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?

Why do we put suits in a garment bag and garments in a suitcase?

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?

Why do we have hot water heaters?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why do 'tug'boats push their barges?

Why do they sell a pound cake that only weighs 12 ounces?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together?

Why do they call it disposable douche? Is there a kind of douche you keep after using?

How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?

How can there be "self help GROUPS"?

How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

How can someone "draw a blank"?

How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Does the Postmaster General need a stamp of approval?

Does the little mermaid wear an algebra?

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as 4's?

Do one legged ducks swim in circles?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

Do fish get cramps after eating?

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window!

Did the early settlers ever go on a camping trip?

Did Adam and Eve have navels?

Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

Can I get arrested for running into a Fire House yelling Movie! Movie!?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?

Aren't all generalizations false?

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?

Why do they call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere but call it a hemorrhoid when its in your ass?

If you lived in Siberia and you wronged the Russians government, where would they send you?

How can military troops be deployed if they have never been ployed to begin with?

What should one call a male ladybird?

What would you use to dilute water?

How come overtones and undertones are the same thing?

If you take an oriental person and spin him around a few times, does he become disoriented?

Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?

If Barbie is so popular, then why do you have to buy her friends?

I know you can be overwhelmed, and I know you can be underwhelmed, but can you just be whelmed?

Why are turds pinched off at the end?

What would Cheese say if they got their picture taken?

What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?

If you're in hell, and are mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?

If you get cheated by the better business bureau, who do you complain to?

How does Santa get into a house that doesn't have a chimney?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Why do the ABC song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep all have the same tune?

Why do grocery stores buy so many checkout line registers if they only keep 3 or 4 open?

Why did they name that underwear company fruit of the loom?

Is Disney world the only people trap operated by a mouse?

How can something be new and improved? if it's new, what was it improving on?

Why is it good to be a Daddy's girl, but bad to be a Momma's boy?

why do you get on a bus and a train but get into a car?

If the speed of movement is slower than the speed of light - how fast is a moving light?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why is it you get a penny for your thoughts, but have to put in your two cents worth?

If you fed a bee nothing but oranges, would it start making marmalade?

Why is it that when a person tells you there's over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there's wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

If a Man is talking in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?

If The Flintstones were B.C. and before America, why did they have Flintstones Thanksgiving and Flintstones Christmas?

How come thaw and unthaw mean the same thing?

Is a hot car cool or is a cool car hot?

Is a man full of wonder a wonderful man?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

How can you hear yourself think?

How can you chop down a tree and then chop it up?

If Americans throw rice at weddings, do the Chinese throw hamburgers?

What's the difference between a wise man and a wise guy?

What would happen if an Irresistible Force met an Immovable Object?

Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests?

Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty is an egg?

What if the hokey-pokey really is what it's all about?

Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn't it be leaving a dump?

What happens if someone loses a lost and found box?

Why do they have handicap parking spaces in front of they skating rings?

Why do we leave expensive cars in the driveway, when we keep worthless junk in the garage?

Why is a person that handles your money called a BROKER?

Aren't you tired of people asking you rhetorical questions and you don't know if they are rhetorical questions or not?

If when people freak out they are said to be "having a cow", when cows freak out are they said to be "having a person?"

Why is it called lipstick when it always comes off?

If masochists like to torture themselves, wouldn't they do it best by not torturing themselves? and if so, aren't we all masochist?

If Wile Coyote had enough money for all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?

Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Have you ever wondered why Trix are only for kids?

Why do you click on start to exit Microsoft Windows?

If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?

Can blind people see their dreams?

Where does the white go when the snow melts?

What came first, the fruit or the color orange?

Is a sleeping bag a nap sack?

If Pringles are "so good that once you pop, you can't stop" why do they come with a resealable lid?

Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with black stripes?

Did they have antiques in the olden days?

Why are pennies bigger than dimes?

If you dig a tunnel straight through the earth, will you come out with your feet first?

How come the sun makes your skin darker but your hair lighter?

What do you call male ballerinas?

Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?

Why do they call it a black light when it's really purple?

Why is the blackboard green?

On the periodic table, why do some elements have symbols with letters that aren't even in the word?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If you try to fail and succeed, what did you just do?

Is the opposite of "out of whack" "in whack"

Why are toe nail clippers bigger than finger nail clippers when your toe nails are smaller than your finger nails?

If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?

What's the opposite of opposite?

Why do we scrub Down and wash Up?

Why is it when your almost dead your on deaths doorstep, but when your actually dead your not in deaths house?

Do sore thumbs really stick out?

If you accidentally ate your own tongue, what would it taste like?

If love is blind, how can we believe in love at first sight?

Why is an electrical outlet called an outlet when you plug things into it? Shouldn't it be called an inlet.

Why is an elevator still called an elevator even when its going down?

Can good looking Eskimo girls be called hot?

Why do birds have white poop?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?

Why is it called eggplant, when there's no egg in it?

Why is it called pineapple, when's there neither pine nor apple in it?

Why are boxing rings square?

If somebody vanished without a trace, how do people know they are missing?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up "there" anyway?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why do people say "You scared the living daylights out of me" when daylight is not living?

Is the fear of flying groundless?

Do mimes watch silent movies?

Does peanut butter really have butter in it?

Why is it that cargo is transported by ship while a shipment is transported by car?

Why doesn't a chicken egg taste like chicken?

If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?

Does a postman deliver his own mail?

If feathers tickle people, do they tickle birds?

Can you sentence a homeless man to house arrest?

What do people in China call their good plates?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why is the third hand on the watch called second hand?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Why can magicians make things disappear into thin air, but not thick air?

Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery?

Why is it that lemon dishsoap is made with real lemons, but lemon juice is artificial flavoring?

Why are they called goose bumps? Do geese get people bumps?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?

Do vampires get AIDS?

Why are SOFTballs hard?

If Milli Vanilli fell in the woods, would someone else make a sound ?

Why does mineral water that has "trickled through mountains for centuries" go out of date next year?

Why is it called a "drive through" if you have to stop?

NEW STUFF

Its everywhere

I put on (1) new pic

and a bazzilion new videos ( 2 or 3 from Bullet in a Bible )

and some LIVE & RARE songs

trust me it took forever to find them

ya so enjoy and comment and crap cuz it keeps me entertained

M.A.S.H.

I have to say, ONLINE MASH Is the most fun thing EVER

Im going to live w/ Gerard Way, drive a black BMW, and play guitar for MCR.

OR ima live w/ Tre and be his dominated love slave and have 286 kids and drive a red mini cooper.

This is the best game EVER

So play it

STUFF FOR YOU ALL TO DOWNLOAD

Go HERE for mp3's

go here for cool fonts ( mine on my comp 1039/Smooth )

Here for a desktop theme

and I guess thats it....

sorry I havent been around alot

Peace out

click it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTjyw_N-Xc0

just click it yo

hullo hullo hullo!

I havent posted in a while.

ummmm.....

i need to post pix of south park green day cuz theyre cute.

They even make mike look cute.

nothing agenst him, but i just dont see how hes attractive.

oh well

I went to the auction saturday night and didn't get home till 1am.

I need to go back to SFOG.

well I guess thats it

L8R NIMRODS

: )

SIX FLAGS!

I went to SFOG yesterdaay...

we only stayd for a few hours.

I didnt get to ride too much, then Paul lost his cell phone, then I lost my purse w/ my iPod and season pass in it and my dad yelled @ me.

I took his hat and threw ( cause he was gonna leve it) then he got MADDER then I had to run half way accross the park to get it. FUN.

TODAY...

bored again.

i went on the interweb and went on yahoo answers.

I'm going Six Flags tommorrow, and Ill try to remeber to take pix and post them.

If not, get over it.

Ive gotta go down to the barn, I guess.

L8R!

Bored

bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored.

I'm not getting a vent. dummy yet.

too expen$ive.

I only gots 50$.

Ill get sumting else.

i guess thats all homies...

L8R!

My new friend

I decided I'm getting a ventriliquist's dummy w/ my money frum camp.

I'm gonna make him all creepy and stuff, He'll be wicked.

I hope they have the kind I want.

anyways, I'll post pix when i get him.

LATER, NIMRODS!

Greendaygreendaywoo's Journals

Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?

NEW STUFF

M.A.S.H.

STUFF FOR YOU ALL TO DOWNLOAD

click it

hullo hullo hullo!

SIX FLAGS!

TODAY...

Bored

My new friend